Fear is a fascinating and complex emotion that affects us all—humans and animals alike. Fear is a natural response that helps protect us from danger. It’s our brain’s way of alerting us to potential threats, even when nothing harmful has occurred. Historically, fear has been crucial for survival, preparing us to either fight, flee, or freeze in risky situations. While we don't face the same dangers today, our brains still trigger fear in response to perceived emotional, social, or physical threats. Understanding and managing fear can help us navigate life’s challenges more calmly and effectively.
Trauma Versus Fear
In my musings below, I am only exploring fear, not trauma. Fear is a natural, immediate response to a perceived threat, activating the body's fight-or-flight response to protect us. It tends to be temporary and fades once the danger passes. Trauma, however, is a deeper psychological response to a distressing or harmful event. Unlike fear, trauma lingers, often affecting how a person processes emotions, reacts to stress, and experiences the world. Trauma can alter brain function, leading to long-term anxiety, hypervigilance, and difficulty feeling safe, even when no immediate threat is present. While fear is about present danger, trauma is a lasting impact of past experiences. Being trauma-informed when exploring fear is particularly important and many of you may be aware of Whiskey (my Brumby) who had a traumatic first saddling experience and has flashbacks and a lot of brace and tension around saddling even now. (Yet another blog to write about!)
Neurodiverse children may perceive and experience fear differently due to variations in how their brains process information and emotions. For instance, children with autism might struggle with understanding social cues, leading to heightened fear in unfamiliar social situations. Those with ADHD may react more impulsively to fear or have difficulty regulating their emotions. Sensory sensitivities common in neurodiverse individuals can also amplify feelings of fear in environments that others find neutral.
These differences are certainly noticeable when observing an individual’s responses to various interactions with the horses or other farm situations such as meeting a possum or observing sheep.
Just to reassure parents, I am not performing fear-based experiments with your children! Although, I will gradually challenge their window of tolerance which is another blog to write! My musings are just curiosities that I have observed while working with children & horses and questions that pop into my mind as I am walking the dogs along the creek each morning.
Are Children More Afraid Than They Used to Be?
In my practice, I've noticed a shift in how children experience and express fear. Fear has become a more common thread in their emotional landscape. Is it possible that children today are more afraid than they used to be? With the constant barrage of information, often alarming, from tech and screen time, it's no wonder that fear might be more present in their lives. But this leads to another question: has tech made us more afraid, or has it desensitized us in some ways? I know there is plenty of evidence-based research around that would answer these questions, but I would love to hear from you – what have you noticed? There are always exceptions, and I certainly have children attend who do not experience fear or anxiety but then there are others who appear fearful or anxious about many things.
The Role of Tech and Screen Time
On one hand, constant exposure to distressing news or social media can heighten our sense of fear, making the world seem more dangerous than it is. On the other hand, the detachment from real-life experiences that screens provide could make us less sensitive to real dangers, leaving us ill-prepared to face them. The balance between these two effects is something I often consider when working with children who have a heightened sense of fear. You may have experienced a little social anxiety when going out in the “real world” after COVID lockdowns and I often feel that some children and adults who are spending more time on their phones and computers in their rooms are experiencing this when asked to attend school or after school activities. If you struggled with social cues, it would certainly be easier to stay at home on a device rather than be in a social situation with incongruent humans!
We are no longer cave people!
Our caveman's need for fear, which once protected us from immediate physical threats like predators, is no longer as relevant in modern life. However, our bodies still respond to stress and fear through the same sympathetic (fight-or-flight) and parasympathetic (rest-and-digest) nervous system responses. In today’s world, these responses are often triggered by less tangible threats, such as work pressures, social anxiety, or information overload. Chronic activation of the sympathetic nervous system can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and health issues like high blood pressure and weakened immune function. Without the need to physically escape danger, many of us struggle to properly regulate these natural responses, leading to a heightened state of stress that can impact mental and physical health. Balancing this with relaxation techniques is key to managing modern-day fears.
Horses and Humans: Who's More Afraid?
Interestingly, I see parallels between how people and horses experience fear. Some horses, like some people, are more fearful by nature. They might react strongly to new stimuli, while others are calmer and more collected. This raises the question of whether fear is more about individual temperament than the environment. In both humans and horses, the key to overcoming fear seems to lie in understanding it rather than avoiding it.
Becoming Less Afraid
So how do we become less afraid? For both horses and people, desensitization is a crucial process. It’s about gradually introducing the feared object or situation in a controlled way until the fear lessens. For horses, this might mean converting fear to curiosity. For people, it might mean confronting a fear in small, manageable steps, perhaps with the guidance of a therapist through Exposure therapy which focuses on changing your response to the object or situation that you fear or Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) which involves gradual exposure combined with other ways to learn how to view and cope with the feared object or situation differently.
Desensitization: A Shared Path
The best way to desensitize, whether for horses or humans, is through consistency, patience, and a lot of positive reinforcement. Fear doesn’t vanish overnight; it requires a gradual reprogramming of the brain to see that the feared stimulus is not a threat. In this process, both people and horses can learn that the world is not as scary as it once seemed.
At Bellview Connection, learning mindfulness techniques can help children build essential skills for managing modern-day stressors, fear, and anxiety. Rather than becoming overwhelmed by a "mindfull" state, where worries dominate, children are guided toward being mindful—fully present in the moment. Through observation and interaction with my herd, they can see how horses naturally embody mindfulness, remaining aware and calm in their environment. By connecting with these gentle, non-judgmental animals, children learn to mirror this presence, practising deep breathing, grounding exercises, and emotional regulation. These interactions equip them with valuable tools to face everyday challenges with confidence and calm.
In conclusion, fear is a universal experience, but how we handle it varies greatly between individuals—whether they are neurodiverse children, adults, or even horses. By exploring the roots of our fears and learning how to face them, we can all become a little less afraid, one step at a time.
Feel free to contact me with your thoughts on this subject.
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